In Defense Of Church Youth Groups

Graphic credit:  College Park Church, Indianapolis
www.yourchurch.com

Our family is fortunate to be part of a good local church with a quality youth (junior and senior high ages) program.  We know better than to take it for granted.  We say that because we do know that many youth groups earn the right to be criticized.  This past Sunday our church’s Senior Pastor observed that some go their whole childhood, from nursery through high school, without going to the main corporate worship.  Some may even go so far as to say that age segregated worship is unbiblical and should be abolished altogether.  There is a movement called the National Center for Family Integrated Churches.  That doesn't appear wise, and is well discussed in this more technical post by Pastor John White.

While I acknowledge that youth groups have their strengths and weaknesses, I also believe that truth also applies to every local church.

I submit that the question is not either / or, but the solution is both / and.  As we lead our families in the context of a local church relationship, we fail when we use nursery, then Sunday School, then Youth Group as volunteer babysitters while we go to “big church.”  In contrast, we also fail when we don’t provide our kids with access to worship, lessons, and a network of friends.  So why not both?

Here’s what we generally do:  As a family we go to the 8 am worship (our daughter hasn’t been with us because she is serving in the nursery, and I commend her for it).  At 9:45 we get to go our separate classes.  Call them break-out sessions if you like.

This past summer, Ryan participated in our church’s “Extreme Teens” segment of Vacation Bible School.  He met an excellent adult leader who became his Junior High small group leader.  They have similar interests, helpful, but most helpful is this leader's commitment to youth.  Quality.  This connection has been a win/win for everybody as we’ve had him and his fiancée for dinner.  Through this connection, friendships have been made.  Through this connection I’m trying to get an apprenticeship for Ryan.  Point:  if your children’s group is an additional resource (instead of parent outsourcing), it  can be a profitable opportunity.

One good resource about this is the book Parenting in The Pew - Guiding Your Children into the Joy of Worship by Robbie F. Castleman

As you wrestle with these issues, some points to consider:

• Youth and children’s ministries are only as good as your church as a whole.  If Sunday morning worship is well done in spirit and in truth, that example works it way down to all the ministries.  If inadequate, how can Sunday Schools be better?
• Youth and children’s ministries are a supplement to, not a replacement of, your own family. 
• If ministries are indeed a supplement, then we as parents would do well be familiar with what is the subject matter being taught.  Need a conversation starter with your youth?  Practice your "open ended" questions!
• We also need to be familiar with the theological assumptions underlying the lessons.  Is it grounded in Scripture, or in the latest ideas of the day?  Do your homework - read your Bible.
• Don't be surprised when you find that not everyone attending your son or daughter’s group will be the types you would prefer your kids to hang with.  Good news!  Pray that they would hear and respond to the teaching they hear.
• Maybe volunteer to help (regardless of whether your kids are embarrassed to be seen in public with you).

Are youth groups beneficial?  Harmful?  Depends?